FIRE BY KNIGHT

THE CHALLENGE OF THE SUPERHERO ACADEMY

2012-02-04T10:05:00.000-08:00

Here's a fun little video project that I've been tinkering with....I'm sure that those of us who were kids in the 70's will remember the cartoon this is based on.

SPRING CLEANING!

2012-02-02T15:26:00.000-08:00

I'm not sure how many people still read this blog, but I'm about to start doing some clean up here.

Some of the older blogs will probably be deleted...Only those timeless entries with some redeeming value will be kept.

I will be transferring some of the Superhero Academy Blogs over here as well.

As for the Academy...The blog over there will be getting a clean up also. I intend to get rid of a lot of the clutter and unfinished projects AND then I will start entering individual posts for each show from the archives including a link...which may even be a link to a site other than Blog Talk Radio.

The Superhero Bible Study will continue with one new entry each week until I have finished Part 2 and 3...After that I may be working on part 4 or a Supervillain Bible Study.

Its my goal to streamline my online presence a bit more than it has been. Facebook is being trimmed back. I have stepped away from most of the message boards and will probably close my own message board or rework it completely. MySpace is on its deathbed and my sites there are going away as soon as I'm certain that all my pictures and any important blogs have been saved.

For now I'm keeping this blog...but only as long as its still being useful.

My internet presence is decreasing as my physical presence increases in Hot Springs...Gizmoe, Gilroy, and Crossfire will be doing more on the street than I (the person behind those personnas) am doing online...at least that's the goal.

I just wanted to give a heads up before some of the sillier (or whinier) posts disappear forever...I gotta get rid of the clutter and start impacting the world a little more.

CFtC

2012-01-17T23:25:00.000-08:00

I just finished an awesome book written by my friend Jeff Smith.

From the first page, I found myself drawn into a fascinating story about a man trying to survive in circumstances beyond his control.

I really enjoyed the fact that it was set right here in Hot Springs and several local businesses and events were worked into the story.

This is Jeff's first novel, and a great beginning to what should be a long line of great tales. I highly reccommend that you put this on your reading list.

Andrew RlshCrossfire Welch

http://www.amazon.com/Within-Gates-Jeff-Smith/dp/1466474831/ref=sr_1_4?ie=UTF8&qid=1326610661&sr=8-4

INTERCOP REVISES ITS TOP 20 MOST WANTED EVIL PUPPETS LIST

2012-01-05T10:49:00.000-08:00

I received a most exciting email this morning from my associates at INTERCOP (The fictional international police agency that monitors stuff that most people ignore)

Subject: INTERCOP Most Wanted Evil Puppet Enemy Number 11 has been captured.

CAPTURED AT LAST...He may not have strings, but now he has handcuffs!

A long running undercover operation by an operative code named "Honest John" has resulted in the capture of the fugitive puppet PINOCCHIO who escaped from his puppeteer's strings decades ago. Pinocchio is wanted for questioning in the disappearance of seveal young boys and is suspected in being the mastermind behind a ring of donkey smugglers. Other charges are still being investigated at this time.

As a result of this exciting news INTERCOP is revising its Most Wanted Evil Puppet list once again. Should you recognize ANY of the puppets listed below PLEASE contact INTERCOP immediately.

#1: Bunny Rabbit

#2: Mr. Moose

#3: Lady Elaine Fairchild

#4: Mr. Floppy

#5: Statler and Waldorf

#6: Punch and Judy

#7: Alf (Aka Gordon Chumway)

#8: Professor Bunsen Honeydew and Beaker

#9: Charlie McCarthy

#10: Bert

#11: Madame

#12: Achmed the dead terrorist

#13: Triumph the comic insult dog

#14: Oscar the Grouch

#15: Miss Piggy

#16: The Crypt Keeper

#17: Al Gore

#18: Walter

19: Batty

#20: Octavious Fong

--------------------------------------------------------------

As you can see this is very exciting news...especially for the ROAMING EYE OF DOOM...since their leader, Octavious Fong, has now been added to the INTERCOP TOP 20 WANTED EVIL PUPPETS LIST.

Congratulations Fong..you finally made it!

Now that's different.

2011-12-01T14:43:00.000-08:00

This will take a moment to get to the point...allow me to take the long road to get where we are going and I promise it will be worth it

A few days ago while watching an episode of JUSTICE LEAGUE UNLIMITED I saw something that got the wheels turning inside the helmeted head of mine. The episode was called FLASH AND SUBSTANCE. It featured a day in the life of the Flash taking us from his job at the crime lab to the mega-event of the day - the opening of a museum honoring the Flash.

Everywhere he went this day people cheered their fun loving, free spirited, class clown of a superhero...with a few exceptions.

First, he was joined for his special day by two of the Justice League's more serious members...and by serious I mean grumpy, brooding, and generally not very fun. These two would be Batman and Orion. Orion was especially unapproving of the methods used by the JLU's class clown throughout the episode.

Secondly, Flash was shadowed thoughout the day by four members of his rogues gallery who decided that it was time to destroy him once and for all. Captain Cold, Captain Boomerang, Mirror Master, and Prankster make a pact over coffee to take out the Flash permanately.

Aside from that, it was a pretty basic JLU filler story with one exception. I'm linking to the YouTube vids of the episodes below so you can watch...pay close attention to the second video at the 4 minute mark. The three heroes (two real warriors and one clown) walk into a bar filled with supervillains to find out what the rogues are planning. Batman tries to intimidate Prankster which doesnt work. Then Orion prepares to do some more physical interrogation...but the Flash stops him...and it happens.

What happens? I'm glad you asked. THE MAGIC HAPPENS!

Watch for yourself...Then I'll resume my rambling.

OK...did you see that?

Im talking about how the Flash acted heroic while the two more serious heroes acted like thugs...and how the villain responded to his heroic - or should I say caring and friendly - method of doing things.

Flash took a moment to demonstrate that the real enemy is NOT the person facing you, but the underlying issue that has brought that person to the position they are in.

Have you noticed that Batman's enemies keep coming up with more and more evil plans while Flash's enemies often end up finding legal ways to use their abilities? Why is that? Because the Flash takes the time to try and reform his enemies while Batman simply takes them down.

An open hand versus a closed fist...its an age old argument in methodology.

Of course some people in this RLSH community are going to say Im being idealistic. They will say that only works in cartoons and that I need to stop trying to use comic books as a source of reality. I dare say that some will call me a coward who is too afraid to fight for what I believe.

And I will remind them which of us has stopped a violent crime and which of us has most likely spilled Doritos on the keyboard while pretending to be a tough guy.

I say the philosophy of the open hand is more than just a comic book notion and a pipe dream...and my epiphany of this past week has been proven true by real world events today.

(You do know what the real world is right? Its that thing outside your momma's basement door...That big place where your RC Cola's and Moon Pies come from.)

Check this out...I was shown this today...and inside me the voice of Wally West screamed YES!!!!

http://www.npr.org/2008/03/28/89164759/a-victim-treats-his-mugger-right

A Victim Treats His Mugger Right
March 28, 2008

Julio Diaz has a daily routine. Every night, the 31-year-old social worker ends his hour-long subway commute to the Bronx one stop early, just so he can eat at his favorite diner.

But one night last month, as Diaz stepped off the No. 6 train and onto a nearly empty platform, his evening took an unexpected turn.

He was walking toward the stairs when a teenage boy approached and pulled out a knife.

"He wants my money, so I just gave him my wallet and told him, 'Here you go,'" Diaz says.

As the teen began to walk away, Diaz told him, "Hey, wait a minute. You forgot something. If you're going to be robbing people for the rest of the night, you might as well take my coat to keep you warm."

The would-be robber looked at his would-be victim, "like what's going on here?" Diaz says. "He asked me, 'Why are you doing this?'"

Diaz replied: "If you're willing to risk your freedom for a few dollars, then I guess you must really need the money. I mean, all I wanted to do was get dinner and if you really want to join me ... hey, you're more than welcome.

"You know, I just felt maybe he really needs help," Diaz says.

Diaz says he and the teen went into the diner and sat in a booth.

"The manager comes by, the dishwashers come by, the waiters come by to say hi," Diaz says. "The kid was like, 'You know everybody here. Do you own this place?'"

"No, I just eat here a lot," Diaz says he told the teen. "He says, 'But you're even nice to the dishwasher.'"

Diaz replied, "Well, haven't you been taught you should be nice to everybody?"

"Yea, but I didn't think people actually behaved that way," the teen said.

Diaz asked him what he wanted out of life. "He just had almost a sad face," Diaz says.

The teen couldn't answer Diaz — or he didn't want to.

When the bill arrived, Diaz told the teen, "Look, I guess you're going to have to pay for this bill 'cause you have my money and I can't pay for this. So if you give me my wallet back, I'll gladly treat you."

The teen "didn't even think about it" and returned the wallet, Diaz says. "I gave him $20 ... I figure maybe it'll help him. I don't know."

Diaz says he asked for something in return — the teen's knife — "and he gave it to me."

Afterward, when Diaz told his mother what happened, she said, "You're the type of kid that if someone asked you for the time, you gave them your watch."

"I figure, you know, if you treat people right, you can only hope that they treat you right. It's as simple as it gets in this complicated world."

There it is again..THE MAGIC!

Mr. Diaz had every reason to fight back. He had every reason to resist. He had every reason to want this guy to be arrested, incarcerated, and punished to the maximum extent allowable. But he didnt.

Chances are many of us in the RLSH community could have or WOULD have fought back...and Im sure more than a few would have taken things beyond just self defense in some delusional belief that they were teaching him a lesson

Mr. Diaz however did something that actually DID teach this young man a lesson...and that lesson was that someone actually cared.

And that lesson impacted his life...How cool is that?

My pastor used to tell us "People will not care how much you know until they know how much you care." Basically, that means that people arent looking for answers...they are looking for someone who will listen to them...someone who cares about their pain...someone who isnt going to look down on them for being less than perfect.

I wonder how effective the RLSH community would be if we applied this to our work.

Face it...people don't care how much martial arts training we have, how many weapons we carry, or how big our baton is...they want to know that someone respects them as a person and cares about them even when they are in the wrong.

Maybe we should find more ways to fix things without tazers, pepper spray, and fisticuffs...then we might see some lives truly changed.

Proverbs 15:1

A soft answer turns away wrath, But a harsh word stirs up anger.

2011-11-25T05:14:00.001-08:00

True Meaning of Christmas
Author: Jim Strong

Just a week before Christmas I had a visitor. This is how it happened. I just finished the household chores for the night and was preparing to go to bed, when I heard a noise in the front of the house. I opened the door to the front room and to my surprise, Santa himself stepped out next to the fireplace.

"What are you doing?" I started to ask. The words choked up in my throat and I saw he had tears in his eyes. His usual jolly manner was gone. Gone was the eager, boisterous soul we all know. He then answered me with a simple statement . . .

"TEACH THE CHILDREN!" I was puzzled. What did he mean? He anticipated my question and with one quick movement brought forth a miniature toy bag from behind the tree. As I stood bewildered, Santa said, "Teach the children!

Teach them the old meaning of Christmas. The meaning that now-a-days Christmas has forgotten. "Santa then reached in his bag and pulled out a FIR TREE and placed it before the mantle. "Teach the children that the pure green color of the stately fir tree remains green all year round, depicting the everlasting hope of mankind, all the needles point heavenward, making it a symbol of man's thoughts turning toward heaven."

He again reached into his bag and pulled out a brilliant STAR. "Teach the children that the star was the heavenly sign of promises long ago. God promised a Savior for the world, and the star was the sign of fulfillment of His promise."

He then reached into his bag and pulled out a CANDLE. "Teach the children that the candle symbolizes that Christ is the light of the world, and when we see this great light we are reminded of He who displaces the darkness."

Once again he reached into his bag and removed a WREATH and placed it on the tree. "Teach the children that the wreath symbolizes the real nature of love. Real love never ceases. Love is one continuous round of affection."

He then pulled from his bag an ORNAMENT of himself. "Teach the children that I, Santa Claus, symbolize the generosity and good will we feel during the month of December."

He then brought out a HOLLY LEAF. "Teach the children that the holly plant represents immortality. It represents the crown of thorns worn by our Savior. The red holly berries represent the blood shed by Him.

Next he pulled from his bag a GIFT and said, "Teach the children that God so loved the world that he gave his begotten son." Thanks be to God for his unspeakable gift.

Santa then reached in his bag and pulled out a CANDY CANE and hung it on the tree. "Teach the children that the candy cane represents the shepherds' crook. The crook on the staff helps to bring back strayed sheep to the flock. The candy cane is the symbol that we are our brother's keeper."

He reached in again and pulled out an ANGEL. "Teach the children that it was the angels that heralded in the glorious news of the Savior's birth. The angels sang Glory to God in the highest, on earth peace and good will toward men."

Suddenly I heard a soft twinkling sound, and from his bag he pulled out a BELL,. "Teach the children that as the lost sheep are found by the sound of the bell, it should ring mankind to the fold. The bell symbolizes guidance and return.

Santa looked back and was pleased. He looked back at me and I saw that the twinkle was back in his eyes. He said, "Remember, teach the children the true meaning of Christmas and do not put me in the center, for I am but a humble servant of the One that is, and I bow down to worship him, our LORD, our GOD."

2011-11-21T06:12:00.000-08:00

The real superheroes...kids fighting for their life everyday against the evil villain known as CDH

During yesterday's SUPERHERO ACADEMY (blog talk radio show) we discussed the possibility of organizing a mass gathering of HEART HEROES (the kids themselves) at the Superman Celebration in Metropolis as a way to bring attention the the cause of CDH (Congenital Disease of the Heart) which is the number one killer of children BTW.

If you don't know about Heart Heroes, they are my favored charity, so let me tell you about them.

Heart Heroes is a charity that gives custom made superhero capes to children suffering from CDH. These capes help the children to harness the power of their inner superhero to face the massive challenges they have just to live. These children face incredible obstacles including multiple open heart surgeries and the capes give them the courage to face these challenges without fear.

Its so simple...and so powerful.

The capes cost $25 each. The children are given a gift card and then they design and order their own cape online (from Powercapes).

You can learn more about them at the link below...and be sure to read some of the testimonials while you are there...but bring a box of kleenex because you will cry.

http://www.heartherocapes.com/index.html

I would like to gather together a group of people willing to assist with the planning of this event and coordinate it with Kitty Burton of Heart Heroes and the people from Powercapes (who actually make the capes for them) and make this happen.

I would love to see hundreds of little Heart Heroes standing at the base of the Superman statue surrounded by adult cosplayers and RLSH's on that Sunday afternoon for an awesome group picture. That is my goal for 2012.

Theres plenty of room for everyone here...Lets fill this place up with HEART HEROES!

Anyone who is willing to help with this project, PLEASE let me know so we can get things started. My email is crossfire_the_crusader@live.com
Thank you

Crossfire the Crusader.
PS: I want to encourage EVERYONE that can to donate to Heart Heroes THIS WEEK...An anonymous donor has agreed to donate one cape for every two cape donations given between now and Thanksgiving...They have a waiting list of 60 kids right now...at this time last year the waiting list was over 200...We can easily clear that waiting list if we try...You folks have done an amazing job with the cape drive this year and a lot of children are gaining strength from the capes you have donated...We are almost there folks...keep up the great work!

SUPERHERO ACADEMY ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY

2011-11-13T17:22:00.000-08:00

I wanted to share the montage I played today on the show as a tribute to all the great people who have joined me on the show this past year.

In order of appearance...Amazonia, Anonyman, Artisteroi, Brandy Roseth (The mother of Power Boy), Myself (speaking about Dr martin Luther King Jr), Captain Australia, Captain Black, Civitron, Tonya Kay (aka Creature), Me again, Danger Man, Dangerwoman, Geist, Golden Valkyrie, Kitty Crafton Burton of Heart Heroes, Valerie Finnigan of Heroes Fallen Studios, Knight Owl, Lunar Veil, Midnite Detective, Phoenix Jones, The Patriot, Peter Tangen, Pheris, Razorhawk, Silver Sentinel, Stormbringer, Superhero, Tea Krulos, Thantos the Avenger, The Eye, The Fox of Albany, Treesong, UrbanAvenger, Zetaman, and Gene Wilder as Wille Wonka.

SUPER "FRIENDS"

2011-11-12T06:41:00.000-08:00

How do you tell the heroes from the trolls?

ATTENTION RLSH, RLSV, X-ALTS, and whatever else you call yourselves...I think I need to clarify something for the sake of the new people...In light of several conversations I've had the past few weeks.

I probably recieve an average of three to five friend requests every day from people claiming one of these titles. I accept most of them because I am host of a Blog Talk radio program that is geared toward this community.

However...

I need to point out that just because I accept your friendship does not mean that I accept your stories, believe your claims, or accept your methods of doing things.

Among those friend requests I often find fake accounts which are being used to troll the community and stir up drama.

I also find people who are simply role playing and think this is an online game community or something.

And I find out right liars...charalatans...and decievers.

When you add me as a freind dont expect to be able to send me a message and expect to be the next guest on SUPERHERO ACADEMY. Its not going to happen. The visiting professors on SHA are people I have taken the time to observe and get to know. I know what they do and how the do it because I have seen it.

When I recieve an email from Shadow-Ninja-Spider-Wolf-Xtreme-whatever and he is telling em that he's performed amazing rescues, stopped massive amounts of crime, and has recieved commendations from the local government a red flag pops up.

I only know of a few people in the community who have received commendations from their local government and they had to WORK to get that...and I was privledged to be able to learn of their exploits as they happened and digitally be there when they recieved their reward.

Im also very concerned about those who think the choice to become a RLSH means they go out and act as judge, jury, and executioner. Thats not heroism...its called vigialntism and its against the law. If you are planning ways to hurt people, kill people, and/or destroy property in a misguided attempt to enforce the law then you are yourself becoming a criminal...and you deserve to be punished if you choose to act in that manner.

Furthermore...if you have this extensive history and ongoing adventures but they are so secret that nobody can ever prove it happened you will set off my Bullcrap alarms and I WILL call you on it...If you are impacting the world the the world will know its being impacted.

If you are a troll...I will delete you.

If you are playing a fantasy online game with me...I will delete you.

If you are discussing things that are not legal or safe...I will delelte you.

If you show your rear end every time you post....I will delete you

If you are spreading a load of BS claims and fantasy stories...I will give you one chance to come clean...after that I will delete you.

The purpose of me accepting people is because of the show. The purpose of SUPERHERO ACADEMY is to allow like minded people to share ways to impact the world for the better.

Im not doing this to help you find a spotlight to dance in and Im not here to legitimize your list of fantasty claims and other lies.

so...

Gotta walk before you can fly, Ralph.

If you are serious about being a RLSH, then please realize that the first few weeks of your online life you will be screened...vetted...and scrutinized. We have to do this to weed out the phonies and problem children.

We will demand proof...pictures...news articles...video...and probably a few pizzas and cold sodas...LOL

Its not personal...its what we have to do.

In the meantime, go out and impact your world...We'll be watching proudly as you do!

Ten Things Parents Can Do to Make Halloween Safer

2011-10-18T21:58:00.000-07:00

I recieved this in an email from the National Center For Missing and Exploited Children today...I thought I would share it here.

Ten Things Parents Can Do to Make Halloween Safer
"The Mentalist" Actor Tim Kang Tells Parents How They Can Build Safety into Halloween This Year
Halloween is one of the most exciting times of the year for children, but sometimes the most hectic for parents. Nearly 94 percent of children between the ages of four and twelve participate in Halloween activities each year. Tim Kang, actor from the hit CBS show The Mentalist has partnered with the National Center for Missing & Exploited Children (NCMEC) to help educate parents about what they should be telling their children to keep them safe. Parents need to take a moment to consider basic safety precautions that will make Halloween a safer night of fun.

CHOOSE bright, flame-retardant costumes or add reflective tape to costumes and candy bags so children are easily seen in the dark. In addition, carry a glow stick or flashlight.
PLAN a trick-or-treating route in familiar neighborhoods with well-lit streets. Avoid unfamiliar neighborhoods, streets that are isolated, or homes that are poorly lit inside or outside.
NEVER send young children out alone. They should always be accompanied by a parent or another trusted adult. Older children should always travel in groups.
ALWAYS walk younger children to the door to receive treats and don’t let children enter a home unless you are with them.
BE SURE children do not approach any vehicle, occupied or not, unless you are with them.
DISCUSS basic pedestrian safety rules that children should use when walking to and from houses.
CONSIDER organizing a home or community party as an alternative to “trick-or-treating.”
MAKE sure children know their home phone number and address in case you get separated. Teach children how to call 911 in an emergency.
TEACH children to say “NO!” or “this is not my mother/father” in a loud voice if someone tries to get them to go somewhere, accept anything other than a treat, or leave with them. And teach them that they should make every effort to get away by kicking, screaming and resisting.
REMIND children to remain alert and report suspicious incidents to parents and/or law enforcement.

“Child safety is vital year round, but Halloween is an especially important time for parents and children to pay extra attention to their surroundings and not let their guard down,” said actor Tim Kang a spokeperson for NCMEC. “Parents need to exercise a few basic safety precautions to help ensure that Halloween is both fun and safe.”

Downloadable Halloween Safety Flyers in English and Spanish:

http://ncmec.vo.llnwd.net/o15/downloads/special/HalloweenSafety2009.pdf

http://ncmec.vo.llnwd.net/o15/downloads/special/HalloweenSafety2009.pdf

On the wrong side of the handcuffs.

2011-10-12T23:03:00.000-07:00

Don't tell me how to do my job! I'm a professional!

I often referred to him jokingly as Blade the vampire hunter, because of the attitude he presented whenever he arrived on the scene. This day, however, I simply called him by his name, Officer X (name withheld).

This day, he was there to arrest ME.

"Why?" you ask.

That's a good question. And to answer that I have to go back a few hours in the story.

I was working the front desk of the motel I managed when I got a call from one of the rooms. The man on the line, someone I had known for years, asked me to come up to his room because there was a problem. I asked the nature of the problem and he would only tell me to come up there to speak to him.

When I arrived at the room, I found the man and his aunt setting there waiting for me. She had obviously been crying. He then told me what had happened.

A person I had checked in that morning had robbed her and attempted to rape her.

This man had come in off the street asking for help. He said he needed a place to stay but he didnt have enough for a room. After talking to him for a few minutes, I gave him a "manager" discount and let him have the room for $25. I never anticipated that he would be a problem and even talked with him briefly about somewhere he could find some day work so he could rent another night and buy some food.

I misjudged him.

He had gone upstairs to his room and began running his game. He told other customers his sob stories to try and get money from them. Then he talked this lady and her nephew into coming to his room to play cards. After a short time he convinced the nephew to go to his own room and get some beer. Then he locked the door behind him and made his move. He tried to force himself on her and she managed to fight him off long enough for the nephew to return. He backed off at the sound of the nephew approaching the door, and she rushed out without her purse.

A few minutes later, the nephew went back in after the purse, but by that time the man had already stolen all the cash from it. By the time he got back to her room with the purse, the man had already called her room and threatened to kill her if she called the police. The nephew then took her to his room and called me.

I went to the room with them and told him to return the money and to get out of the hotel. He refused, at first, but gave up the cash when I dialed to police on my cell phone. I then told him to get his things and leave. He again refused and a shouting match between us began.

At this point several other customers were outside their rooms watching the incident. I motioned to two of the people and told them to follow me as I grabbed the man by the sleeve of his shirt and walked him to the lobby.

Don't make me use my bullet!

A few minutes later, the police arrived. I asked them to escort him to the room to get his belongings and to remove him from the property. I provide them with a ban order form already filled out (I kept them handy for times like this) and even refunded his $25...which I didn't have to do.

Blade...I mean Officer X...didn't want to hear what I had to say about the man threatening to cut me with a razor that was in his pocket. He didn't want to hear about him threatening to kill the woman. He didn't even care when the man pulled a crack pipe out of the dresser drawer and stuffed it in his pocket right in front of them...Something I pointed out when it happened.

Officer X, grudgingly did what was asked of him, signed the ban form, and removed the man from the property.

Within 30 minutes we began getting threatening phone calls from him. He threatened to sue us. He threatened to blow up the building. He even threatened that he and his brothers would catch me in town and beat me to death. I called the police to report the harassing phone calls.

Then Officer X pulled up again...another officer pulled up right behind him.

I started to tell him what was going on and he pulled out his cuffs and reading me my rights.

I stepped back and asked what I was being arrested for.

Officer X then informed me that the man they removed had told them that I threw him down the stairs.

I said. "You've got to be kidding?"

Officer X informed me that he was serious and I was being arrested for assault.

I asked "Why would I throw him down the stairs when it would have been so much easier just to toss him off the balcony?"

The other officer busted out laughing.

I then told them that I had witnesses and had my desk clerk call the two men who followed me down the stairs.

The officers took a few minutes speaking to my witnesses and then turned back to me. They informed me that I was not being arrested...but they refused to take a report on the terroristic threats.

I was told that I had to go down to the police station in the morning to press charges.

And as they walked away, Officer X informed me that "One of these days Im going to have your punk a-- in these cuffs...I'm tired of your sh--."

What we have here...Is a failure to communicate!

I eventually had to report Officer X and another Officer to their Lieutenant and internal affairs because they were harassing me. I actually had them banned from the property...which means its a felony for them to even drive up in the parking lot.

In the weeks to come, the other officer who responded that night came by many times. She and several others on the force told me that they appreciated what I was doing as I cleaned up a problem area in the city. I've been told that my efforts were discussed and applauded by the city and county police, and I've even had an FBI agent tell me that he knew about "the fat guy with the bat" that cleaned up that drug infested motel.

Why am I sharing this? Because, I want everyone to know that a responding police officer doesn't always see everything. They can be biased. They can be short sighted. And they can make poor decisions . I support the police...even though I've had to deal with a few Blade types...but I don't think for a moment that every person arrested is guilty as charged.

Police roll up on an incident after the fact and have just a few moments to make a decision...and thats not always easy.

One time I called the police due to a fight in the building. By the time they got there I had managed to seperate the combattants, but the one who caused the issue was still screaming and trying to get the fight going again. When the police arrived, three of them rushed me because I was holding a baton. When I informed them I was the manager the backed off a bit and started lecturing me. I actually ahd to ask them to hold the lecture until after they took care of the crackhead who was freaking out in my parking lot.

Fortunately, I have always been able to resolve my situations without being arrested. However, one wrong word, or one wrong decision. could very easily have had me setting in a cell right alongside the criminals I was challenging.

That said...I want to say that everyone who wants to use the recent incident with Phoenix Jones as an opportunity to tear him and other RLSHs apart need to back up and chill out. The original incident happened very fast...I can't say that my response would have been any better or worse because I wasn't there.

What I do know is that eyewitness testimony and evidence were ignored on the scene and will have to be brought out in court.

What I do know is that people involved in the other side of the fight have already changed their story publically.

What I do know is the officer in question has a history of bad decisions.

Not every arrest is right...Sometimes the officer is wrong...and sometimes the officer is just a bad cop. I can't say if the officer made the wrong decision any more than I can say if Phoenix Jones made a wrong decision. They both reacted based on what they saw.

Monday morning quarterbacks don't play in the Superbowl...And I can't say that under the same circumstances that I might not have reacted the same as either one of them did.

Its my opinion that the media has blown this out of proportion like they do with ALL stories that involve Phoenix Jones or any other RLSH.

There but for the grace of God goes me.

I want to finish this up with a few words from my friend Captain Black. I want to emphasize that I am not anti police, and he says it better than I ever could.

See you on that high road.

CFtC

THE ADVENTURES OF ELECTRON BOY.

2011-09-20T04:02:00.000-07:00

This past week we lost a tiny hero with a giant heart when ELECTRON BOY lost his battle to cancer. Today - through the wonder of YOU TUBE we can relive his amazing adventure with him once more. Good Journey Electron Boy...the world is a a brighter place because you were a part of it...you shall be missed.

YOU'RE NOT A SUPERHERO!

2011-09-20T01:29:00.000-07:00

How many times have I found myself listening to the same stupid argument. Some new "villain" comes along with the same tired cliche that a person has to be "super" and has to be a "hero" in order to be called a "superhero." They feel that since a person has not achieved the two criteria of having powers and having performed a fantastic act of heroism (which can only be accomplished using said powers - normal heroics arent enough) that its somehow wrong for a person to become a RLSH.

Let me re-introduce my rebuttal before I move on to the snarky responses.

1) Super can mean anything from larger to more colorful...it describes something that is MORE than the normal. For example you SUPER-size your value meal at McBurgers. A Wal Mart with a grocery section is called a SUPER CENTER. and when a child does a good job in school he is commended for doing SUPER. At no time does the word SUPER mean that there has to be power present. In fact its the word POWER that describes the abilities that are magnified with the word SUPER...therefore unless someone is calling themselves a SUPER-POWERED hero then your whole argument of having to have powers goes out the door.

2) and as for the word HERO...A hero is simply the central character of a story. In my life that would be me. In your life that would be you. Holmes was the hero in his mysteries. Robin Hood was the hero in his adventures. And Superman is the hero of his comics. Acts of heroism are not required to be a "hero." Heck...watch Dr. Horrible's Sing-a-long Blog and identify the hero of that story...surprise! Its the criminal who is the hero and the superhero is the villain in that story. HERO has nothing to do with crime fighting or vigilantism...and so long as someone is not claiming to be a crime fighter, vigilante, or other person who DOES actual heroics and cannot back it up with results then there should be no problem with them using the word HERO.

3) SUPERHERO is a seperate term that refers to a character in a fiction. Any kid you ask can pick a superhero out of a crowd of people. They are characters that stand out from the crowd due to their flashy costumes. Their stories are works of fiction in which they may or may not exhibit amazing powers and may or may not perform deeds of valour.

But the argument still continues to resurface.

So I thought about it and we should probably respect the wishes of these people and stop calling ourselves superheroes...after all we arent superheroes...we are just normal people who occasionally dress in weird costumes

And since we are demanding truth I am going on a cross country tour demanding that EVERYONE stop using titles that do not apply...and Im starting with the NFL!

The team in Dallas must immediately stop calling themselves COWBOYS...not one person on that team even looks like a cowboy.

The same goes for the Minnesota Vikings...not an Olaf or a Sven in that bunch...Eric the Awful would make short work of them.

Im reporting Chicago, Detroit, Cincinatti, Atlanta, South Carolina, and Jacksonville to PETA for abusing animals with their mocking use of the name. Furthermore...I think its irresponsible for these teams to encourage people to cheer for these animals. What if a REAL panther, jaguar, or bear were to get loose and some poor unsuspecting soul thought it was a footbal player and tried to get its autograph? Its just WRONG for them to claim status as members of the animal kingdom.

And Im just waiting for the day that someone tried to climb aboard one of the New York Jets to fly across country on an emergency visit to grandma before she dies...We all know that people are too dumb to realize that these are just sports figures and not REAL jets.

And of course...I have to deal with those phonies in New Orleans before someone dies and goes to Hell because they trusted in the so called SAINTS to show them the way to Heaven.

Those arguments sound stupid...don't they?

Well, thats the same load of manure that keeps getting shoveled out at the RSLH community by these lightweight wannabe RLSV's that keep popping up.

If you're going to claim the title of VILLAIN...then how about becoming a worthy adversary. Stop complaining about the use of the term SUPERHERO and start demanding that the people in this community actually do something to IMPACT the world.

Stop asking the same old questions....I'll make it easy and answer them for you now.

Why do I wear a mask? Because Im ugly

Why do I wear a costume? Because its fun.

Why do I call myself a superhero? Because nobody will believe me if I tell them Im Mickey Mouse.

Why wont I give a serious answer to any of these questions? Because, they aren't worth the effort.

If the best challenge you can come up with is "You aren't a superhero." Then I suggest you go put back on your minion shirt and start shoveling coal into Lord Malignance's furnace because you wont last long in the RLSV world.

Whenever you DO come up with a better challenge you can find me at McBurgers...I'll be the guy in the flashy suit with the super-sized root beer!

A quick word from behind the puppet stage

2011-05-21T02:38:00.000-07:00

The video above really has nothing to do with this blog...I just thought it was cute...LOL

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Over the years I have spent many hours crouched behind counters, tables, and puppet stages operating colorful little humanoid figures that we know as puppets. Ive used these as tools for teaching, entertaining, and even at times irritating others...and Ive had a great time doing it too.

Perhaps my time working with puppets has made me a bit crazy, but I have noticed that not all puppets are made of cloth and plastic. Some of them are made of flesh and blood.

And from the back of the room someone says EWWWWW

Im not talking about actual flesh and blood being made into a puppet. Im talking about people who allow themselves to become puppets.

Say WHAT!?! the voice at the back shrieks.

You see, puppets have no will of their own...despite what I might claim when one of my little menagerie acts up during a performance. Puppets act because of the manipulations of the puppeteer.

The parallel here is that PEOPLE are often no more than puppets responding to the actions of manipulative individuals that they associate with.

One doesnt have to search very far into the RLSH/RLSV community to see this in action. Hero X and Villain Y have a fued going and they decide to involve others in their little spat. Soon they have half a dozen others riled up about something that never should have involved them in the first place. As time progresses the situation spirals out of control until all it takes is the mention of a name to send someone into a fit of rage. The original argument is long forgotten, but the puppeteers keep pulling strings and manipulating things to make certain that their side wins.

Now we can accept this as the status quo or we can refuse to allow others to have that power over us. We can continue to face each day wondering what our puppet master is going to do to us and responding in kind OR we can tell them to get their hand out of our...ummm...puppet hole...and leave us alone. We can choose NOT to respond to their manipulations and in doing so we take away their power.

Several years ago during a puppet show one of the human actors over-acted during an ad-lib session and grabbed the puppet off the hand of one of my team members. He was supposed to "lose his temper" with the puppet and "bonk his head" but instead he decided to bodyslam the puppet behind the stage like it was a WWF match. The kids watching were treated to the sight of a hand sticking up from behind the stage for several seconds as the surprised puppeteer gathered his wits and responded to the actors actions.

If we refuse to allow the manipulators that opprtunity to affect us then we in effect leave them setting there with their hand in the air, unsuer of what to do next, and exposed to everyone for what they really are.

Perhaps you are reading this and it angers you that I may have just called you a puppet...would that be admiting that for a moment I have the power over you to make you mad? Does that make ME the puppeteer and therefor the more powerful of us? Does that mean that YOU are impotent to act without MY deciding which way you will move?

I sincerely hope not...I would rather you read these words and recognize those areas in which you have surrendered your own will for the will of someone else and free yourself from the puppeteers in your life. I hope you would recognize those who hold power over you in some way and determine to NOT be their puppet any longer.

That means stop letting Hero X make you mad because he hates kittens. Stop letting Villain Y make you mad because he blogs about something that you dont like. Stop allowing this group or that click to draw you away from your goals with their passionate arguments. Until you do that you will not go anywhere.

And, face it, if you're stuck in one place wondering why you cant get anything done...maybe its because of that puppeteer who's been holding you back his arm lodged in your...ummm...puppet hole.

Good Journey David Wilkerson

2011-04-28T04:17:00.000-07:00

Someone I have long admired, David Wilkerson, went on the be with Jesus yesterday. His determination to reach the hardened sould of New York's street gangs was the subject of the book and movie THE CROSS AND THE SWITCHBLADE. His ministry was an inspiration to me and his death marks the end of a life of service like none other.

Pastor Wilkerson, you were a shining example of how to serve the Lord...The world is poorer for having lost you but Heaven is now richer for having gained your presence...You fought the good fight...You kept the faith...You finished your course...Good Journey David Wilkerson...You shall be missed.

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Id like to share some memorable quotes from the book/movie THE CROSS AND THE SWITCHBLADE...

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Nicky Cruz: You come near me and I'll kill you!
David Wilkerson: Yeah, you could do that. You could cut me up into a thousand pieces and lay them in the street, and every piece will still love you.

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Big Cat: Tell me, Preach. This God of yours, does he rumble?
David Wilkerson: Yeah... Yeah, he rumbles. He's fighting for you right now.

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David Wilkerson: You can take it from this skinny preacher from the hills of Pennsylvania; The cross is mightier than the switchblade.

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Here's the text of the article that announces his death

http://www.cbn.com/cbnnews/us/2011/April/Rev-David-Wilkerson-Killed-in-TX-Car-Crash/

Rev. David Wilkerson, founding pastor of Times Square Church in New York City and author of the well-known book The Cross and the Switchblade, was killed Wednesday in a head-on collision in Texas. He was 79.

"It is with deepest of sadness that we have to inform you of the sudden passing of Reverend David Wilkerson, our founding pastor," Times Square Church Senior Pastor Carter Conlon said in a statement on the church website.

Conlon added that details of the family's wishes and a memorial service would be provided as information became available.

Crash Details

Wilkerson was driving east on U.S. 175 in Texas Wednesday afternoon, and moved into the opposite lane where a tractor trailer was driving westbound. The truck driver saw the car and tried to move out of the way, but still collided with the pastor's car head on, according to Public Safety Trooper Eric Long.

It's unclear what caused Wilkerson to veer into the other lane. His wife Gwen was also involved in the crash and rushed to the hospital, along with the truck driver.

Wilkerson was pronounced dead on the scene.

Last Words

Wilkerson posted a blog dated April 27 -- the day of his death. In the post, titled "When All Means Fail," he encouraged those facing difficulty to "hold fast" and stand strong in faith.

"To those going through the valley and shadow of death, hear this word: Weeping will last through some dark, awful nights, and in that darkness you will soon hear the Father whisper, "I am with you,'" Wilkerson wrote. "Beloved, God has never failed to act but in goodness and love. When all means fail-his love prevails. Hold fast to your faith. Stand fast in his Word. There is no other hope in this world."

Word of the accident began to spread Wednesday night on social networking sites like Facebook and Twitter. Christians urged prayer for Mrs. Wilkerson, who's in critical condition.

Rev. Wilkerson's Impact

Wilkerson's cousin Rich Wilkerson confirmed the death on Twitter.

"It is confirmed my dear cousin David Wilkerson lost his life in a tragic car accident this afternoon..Prayers r needed at this time," he tweeted.

Rev. Wilkerson spent the early part of his ministry reaching out to gang members and drug addicts in New York, as told in his bestselling book The Cross and the Switchblade.

"The term LEGEND is often used to describe a person of extreme influence but what about a man that supersedes superlatives..david wilkerson," his cousin tweeted right after confirming his death.

In 1971, he started World Challenge, Inc. as an umbrella for his crusades, conferences, evangelism and other ministry. The Times Square Church was founded under the group in 1987.

The church is now led by Pastor Carter Conlon and has more than 8,000 members.

Wilkerson also founded Teen Challenge, a Christian outreach program for troubled young people.

"Please remember the Wilkerson family in your prayers as our founder, Rev. David Wilkerson, went to be with the Lord this evening," Teen Challenge told Twitter followers.

He is survived by his wife, four children and 11 grandchildren.

SUPER BALLOON HEROES

2011-03-29T17:15:00.000-07:00

Nothing much to say today. Just wanted to share pics of my latest balloon creations.

You see, Ive been trying to learn some new balloon skills for my clown business and discovered how to make SUPERHEROES out of balloons...and look what Ive done already...expect more as my skill lever increases.

Here's what Ive done so far. Its still rough work, but given time I'll be doing some customs that will knock your socks off...and more than a few of these will end up in the hands of some kids who need a hero even if its only a balloon hero...cause that how I roll!

And now...the Balloon Heroes!

CFtC

I call him BLUE GUY

And this is GREEN GUY

Together they form the BALLOON FORCE

This was an experiment in making a molded face and muscles

I then realized he looked a bit like the VISION so I tweaked him

He keeps asking if I can make a Scarlet Witch balloon for some reason

This guy is my SPACE RANGER

reporting for duty sir!

Rocket pack with cheesy balloon fire trail

Ready to lauch in 10...9...8...7

Gotta work on those landings though

THE SALUTE

2011-02-26T01:00:00.000-08:00

While riding my motorcycle to work the other day something happened to me that made me start thinking. I met another biker and without a thought, we each extended out left arm and pointed toward the center line of the road. This is not unusual. It happens all the time. That day, however it struck a chord in my mind that has led me to write this blog tonight.

Im not a stereotype "biker" by any means. I dont ride a Harley and I dont wear leather. As a matter of fact, in my plaid hoodie and blue backpack, I probably look like a fat nerd who got talked into buying a bike in an effort to look cool on his way to college. In truth, I bought the bike for a cheap form of transportation because I couldnt afford another car payment...I keep it because its fun to ride and gets over 60 MPG...You just can't beat $5 every two weeks for gas back and forth to work.

However, even though I am different from the stereotype, I almost always get a salute from passing bikers. It doesnt matter if its someone in black leather, a blue jean vest, a flashy professional looking jumpsuit, or whatever, the ritual repeats itself over and over. A simple salute is exchanged between men and women who have a common bond in their joy of riding motorcycles.

Im sure many of these people and I would have a hard time riding an elevator together if all we had to go on was our individual personalities, yet as we ride past one another we salute as if to tell each other that we are part of a brotherhood that overcomes those differences. We may never speak to each other in person, but we honor each other with a simple hand gesture...A Salute.

Tradition tells us that the salute originated from the practice of knights in armor tipping their visors to show their faces to other knights when they rode past each other. It has evolved over the years to become a sign of respect for authority. Ranking officers in the military are saluted by enlisted men and lower ranking officers,   The Flag is saluted during the national anthem, revielle, and taps. We salute heroes, elected officials, and people we genuinely respect,

The salute is a sign of respect, but at the same time, it does not say that you agree with 100% of what the person you salute represents. A soldier can salute his commanding officer while not liking the oficer as a person. He can salute that officer, accept his orders, and (so long as those orders are lawful) he can carry out those orders even if he does not agree with them.

So where am I going with this?

I'm glad you asked.

I feel we need something similar to the biker salute in the RLSH community. We have message boards. We have My Space and Facebook pages.   We have Blogs and You Tube accounts. We even have new articles and reality TV shows. What we lack is the common courtesy to acknowledge each other as peers if only in the sense that we are ALL people who have chose to be creative activists in colorful costumes.

Imagine if we took a moment to simply salute those who chose to don the cape and join us in trying to impact the world. Imagine if we didnt worry about if the person wore spandex, leather, or denim. Imagine if we didnt care if they wore a cape or a trenchcoat. Just imagine if we didnt care of they wore a mask, goggles, or a visor. What if only for a moment we just acknowledged that they were trying to do something positive in a creative way just as we have chosen to do.

Perhaps the media wouldnt be so quick to splash our disagreements on the evening news and in the morning papers if we were united by the act of respect that is attached to a simple salute. Perhaps not...but that doesnt change my opinions on the matter.

We need to stop greeting newcomers with the hard line stance that turns them away and greet them with a brief moment of respect. "Welcome the the RLSH community.  Let's make this world a better place together." Should be the greeting that a RLSH recieves from another RLSH long before hearing "You're doing it wrong!"

And while we are at it, lets learn to agree to disagree.   Im not going to agree with everything you say or do. Im sure you wont agree with everything I say and do either. But, we can each learn to operate individually without having a big flame war or chest puffing contest. In other words, we dont have to like each other but we should show respect for each other.

Im sure many of you will think Im wrong. You feel that there is no hope for the various factions to get along. I would offer that I am not asking you to dance together, but merely to remain cordial and keep the infighting between us while showing a united front to the world in general.

The US Navy and US Marine Corps have a well known rivalry. However, sailors and marines work together to protect this nations interests on a daily basis. When there is a threat that affects one, you can be sure the other will be there to watch their back.

Why can't we have that in the RLSH community?

If you are a crimefighter I salute you.
If you are a charity worker, I salute you.
If you are hero support, I salute you.
If you are an oracle, I salute you.
If you are trying to make this world a better place in any way, then I salute you.

Keep up the good work!

GUESS WHAT?

2010-11-20T04:05:00.000-08:00

Its called DIVERSITY...Have a litte TOLERANCE...and GET OVER IT!

I took a look at my collection of comics today and realized something...Every comic has different characters and every character is completely different from every other character. GASP!!!

(Sarcasm added for effect)

From what I can see its pretty much that way in real life also. We are all different. We all think differently. We all operate differently. AND we all LOOK differently.

Every Twinkie is just like the last one...but I aint a Twinkie

If we were all the same then Baskin Robbins wouldn't need 51 flavors of ice cream.

So for those of you who don't like the way I do things because I do things differently...please take a trip to Baskin Robbins and get your OWN ice cream cone...I'm doing my thing and you can go do yours.

I'm not wrong...I'm just different.

Deal with it!

CFtC

I've been thinking...hmmm

2010-11-18T02:15:00.000-08:00

One issue that most RLSH’s seem to agree on is that there is a major problem with homelessness. I don’t know of anyone in the community who has opposed anyone helping the homeless, nor do I know of anyone who has refused the opportunity to help the homeless when they could.

The question that I’ve had running through my mind is not “What can we do?” but rather “What MORE can we do?”

I’ve watched RLSH’s like Thanatos and Zetaman for years now. Their periodic handouts to the homeless have no doubt saved lives. A person could go on for years following their example and would no doubt impact hundreds, maybe thousands, of lives. But I wonder what we could do to help get these people off the streets and back on their feet.

A little over a year ago, I was surprised when the owner of the motel I managed showed up and fired me so his nephew could have my job. I was given three days to pack my stuff and be out of the apartment he provided onsite and I wasn’t getting my last paycheck until I was out. In the period of twenty minutes, I went from employed and secure to unemployed and homeless.

Had it not been for the kindness of an old friend from high school I would have been on the street…along with my wife (who was very sick at the time) and my daughters. The loss of our home and income put us in a situation where my oldest daughter had to drop out of college.

This friend had a small camper that they offered for us to stay in until I could find another job and a place to live. We lived for six weeks in a small camper, with no running water, a small electric space heater, and an extension cord for power. We were able to get into a rent trailer at that time because the the landlord agreed to work with us on paying the first month’s rent and the security deposit. The local food pantry helped us out so we would have food while we struggled to get all our utilities turned on. All in all, it took 3 ½ months for us to get back to some semblance of normal.

What I learned through the process was how easy any one of us could end up homeless, and that it is possible to work our way out. Now I ask “How can I use this experience to help others?”

The way I see it, the people we meet on the street need a few simple things to get out of their situation. They need shelter, food, medical care, and a source of income. I realize that they have to WANT to get off the streets first, but once they make that decision, these simple things are the goals they must achieve.

As I pondered this, I had an idea. What if we could convince the churches to allow us to use their church camp facilities during the months when they are idle and set up a program to help these people get reestablished. The church camps have shelter & showers, food service facilities, medical facilities, and usually have common areas that could be used to set up job training programs. Like Patch Adam’s Gesundheit institute, each person would contribute something to the “community” by working in the facility while they were there to help defray the cost of their stay. The program could be set up with a goal of everyone having to be out by the end of May so that the camps would be ready for the summer. I’d even bet there is grant money available to help pay for the program if someone wanted to pursue it.

The next question I pondered is “What’s next?”

People leaving the camp could be directed to low budget motels, economy apartments, and low cost housing. Many churches already have programs to help people off the street by paying a weeks rent at the motels for those who are in need. Other programs to help with rent at places like this can be found by going through the local food pantries, salvation army, goodwill, and other similar businesses. Most times the program that pays for the first week also help the individual by referring them to jobs.

From there, I would hope the individual would be able to work their way into a better home, better job, and back into society.

Is it just a dream? Maybe. But it’s a good dream…and I think it could be a workable dream.

So the final question is “How can I make this happen?”

I don’t know yet…but rest assured the Crusader isn’t gonna give up on this idea anytime soon…not when there are good men, women, and children living on the streets asking “What are we going to eat today?” and wondering if they will live to see tomorrow.

I welcome anyone who wants to help with this project…You can even take this idea and run with it where you are. I firmly belileve that once its been done ONE TIME we can use that example to do it more and more…and maybe, just maybe we can see fewer people on the streets waiting for that last breath to end their suffering.

Its worth trying.

CFtC

My Hero

2010-10-23T00:08:00.000-07:00

MY HERO

Written by Andrew Welch

(Originally posted just prior to Easter 2007)

He stood there at a fork in times road and looked to the future. His Father pointed down the first path and showed him me and millions like me bound in chains of sin and marching straight for en eternity in Hell.

A tear filled his eye as he saw the never ending torment that we would have to endure. He looked to his Father and asked what he had to do to prevent that tragic path.

“You must take the other road.” The Father told him.

“Then I will do that.” He said looking down the second road and seeing many of those millions worshipping the Father in Heaven.

“Do you understand what that means?” The Father said. “If you walk the other road, you will have to suffer for their healing. You will have to pay the price for their sins.”

“If that’s the price of their salvation, then how can I do less?”

“If you follow this road, my Son, you will have to step away from the glory of Heaven and become one of them.”

“I’ll do it.”

“They will hate you for who you are. You will be accused of great evil by those who should love you. You will be taken prisoner by those who claim to serve you. And you will be charged with crimes that you did not commit.”

“That’s alright…I’ll do it for them.”

“False witnesses will come forth and spread lies about you. Then you will be accused of blasphemy for saying who you are. Other than that, you will not say a word in your defense.”

“If I do not do this, then who will speak for them?”

“You will be handed over to nonbelievers who will punish you greatly. You will be beaten so badly that you will no longer even look human. They will punch you in the face and spit on you. You will be paraded through the street and mocked by your own people.”

“I do not care…If I do not walk this road, then who will? Who will save those poor souls?”

“They will offer to set you free, but your people will demand your death and call for a murderer to be released in your place.”

“I will gladly suffer all that for the sake of those poor souls that need me.”

“You will be forced to carry your own cross up the mountainside where they will nail you to it and let you hang there for hours while you die.”

“Greater love has no man but that he lay down his life for his friends.”

“Knowing that for several hours you will be beaten, tortured, and then killed publicly, you would still choose to walk that road?”

“Yes, Father. Because, if I do not walk that path, they will have to walk the other path. I can endure a few hours of pain and suffering knowing that the people I love will have hope of a better future. I will give my life knowing it gives life to them.”

Then the son turned and walked that road. He suffered the beatings, the mocking, and death so that I could be released from those chains of sin and that I could spend eternity in Heaven.

He chose to give His life for me and millions like me who were on the road to Hell.

But the road did not end at Calvary. His death was not the last step on that path. Three days later, He rose from the grave again conquering death, Hell, and the grave. He rose from that grave not as the beaten, mangled man that was nailed to the cross, but the triumphant KING OF KINGS and LORD OF LORDS.

This (Easter) Sunday, we celebrate the resurrection of Christ. We choose this day to remember the sacrifice he made for us and the victory he won on our behalf. We will be honoring the one TRUE hero who gave his all for US.

All Hail King Jesus!

All Hail Emmanuel!

My Savior!

My Lord!

My Hero!

The Healing Power of Doing Good

2010-10-08T03:03:00.000-07:00

Before I post my own blog, I want to point to Tea Krulo's blog today and thank him for sharing my amazing experience from last night with his readers...RLSH-intervenes-saves-life. Also, please go to his KICKSTARTER page to see how you can help him as he publishes his RLSH book "Heroes in the night."

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A couple days ago I found an interesting article about how doing good can improve your health. It was published on the website of a business/charity here in Hot Springs and I wanted to share it with those of you who follow my blog.

For those of my more villainous acquaintances who seek to find selfish reasons behind some of our acts of altruism...heres something for you to consider. According to the article below, we make our own lives healthier by doing good for others...so perhaps there IS room to consider and ulterior motive.

But that's not why we do it...we do it because its the right thing to do. Any benefits we may recieve health-wise are just icing on the cake....mmmmm cake!

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The Healing Power of Doing Good:

The Health and Spiritual Benefits of Helping Others

by Allan Luks

Allan Luks, former executive director of the Institute for the Advancement of Health and executive director of Big Brothers/Big Sisters of New York City, has studied kindness and the clear cause-and- effect relationship between helping and good health.

Some of the most significant findings of his research include the following:

1. Helping others contributes to the maintenance of good health and can diminish the effect of minor and serious psychological and physical diseases and disorders.

2. The rush of euphoria often referred to as a “helper’s high” after performing a kind act involves physical sensations and the release of the body’s natural painkillers, the endorphins. The initial rush is followed by a longer period of calm and improved emotional well-being.

3. The health benefits and sense of well-being return for hours or even days whenever the helping act is remembered.

4. Stress related health problems improve after performing kind acts. Helping others:

• Reverses feelings of depression.

• Supplies social contact.

• Reduces feelings of hostility and isolation that can cause stress, overeating, ulcers, etc.

• Decreases the constriction in the lungs that leads to asthma attacks.

5. Helping can enhance feelings of joyfulness, emotional resilience, and vigor, and can reduce the unhealthy sense of isolation.

6. The awareness and intensity of physical pain can decrease.

7. Attitudes such as chronic hostility that negatively arouse and damage the body are reduced.

8. A sense of self-worth, greater happiness, and optimism is increased, and feelings of helplessness and depression decrease.

9. When we establish an “affiliative connection” with someone (a relationship of friendship, love, or some sort of positive bonding), we feel emotions that can strengthen the immune system.

10. Caring for strangers leads to immense immune and healing benefits.

11. Regular club attendance, volunteering, entertaining, or faith group attendance is the happiness equivalent of getting a college degree, or more than doubling your income.

I don't take credit for this - but want to share

2010-10-02T22:27:00.000-07:00

I recieved this in an email from the Polly Klaas foundation today and wanted to share it here.

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Dedicated to Polly Hannah Klaas 1981-1993

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Today marks the 17th anniversary of Polly Klaas’ kidnapping. She would be 29 years old, if she were still with us.

One of the members of the original search team recently remarked that the 2 months of intense searching by almost 4000 volunteers was a response by the Petaluma community to a vital threat to one of its own.

Today we talk about community members who are protecting their own with some new and innovative ideas.

Our members often ask this simple question: How can I integrate child safety into my everyday life?

The ideas have blossomed and are exciting, innovative, and SIMPLE!

Here are just a few of the actions offered up by our members, volunteers, and other folks dedicated to keeping not only their own kids, but ALL kids safe.

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GAMMY PATROL

Rose lives in Novato, California and is a grandmother of seven. She took it upon herself to recruit stay at home moms and dads and retirees in the neighborhood to join her in watching out for the safety of neighborhood kids.

Her request was simple and informal:

During those hours children are walking to and from school,

1. Sit on your front porch, or

2. Take a walk or jog around the neighborhood.

Each day Rose sits on her porch and quietly watches children walking home from school.

Rose and her neighbors are doing their part to keep the neighborhood kids safe…and sending this clear message to any predators….”Not in my neighborhood & not on my watch!"

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NEIGHBORHOOD WATCH

Rose’s idea was simple and informal. Some of our members may be interested in a more formal program to help keep their neighborhood kids safe. You can set up a Neighborhood Watch Program. We recommend looking at USAonWatch.org, which has a process with 5 simple steps:

1. Recruit & organize as many neighbors as possible

2. Contact your local law enforcement agency & request that an officer come to one of your scheduled meetings

3. Discuss community concerns & develop an action plan

4. Hold regular meetings and trainings

5. Implement a phone tree & take action steps

USAonWatch.org has helpful information and training materials that have helped many community members across the country.

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SAFETY KIT PARTIES

We’ve all either heard of or belong to a book club. Book clubs are a great way for neighbors and friends to get together and discuss common interests. Why not make the book of the week the Polly Klaas® Foundation Child Safety Kit? This Kit has 24 pages of guidance to parents, an a lot of ideas for discussion.

Members have expressed much interest in hosting a “Safety Kit Party,” a social event where those who share the common goal of keeping the community’s children safe can:

1. Discuss the Safety Kit itself.

2. Share personal stories relating to child safety.

3. Discuss new and innovative ways to keep the neighborhood children safe.

We have also heard of church groups meeting around our Child Safety Kit.

Our members are always coming up with new ways to integrate child safety into their every day lives. Please know your simple actions can make a huge difference in the lives of children in your community.

What is Evil?

2010-08-20T07:53:00.000-07:00

Bad to the bone?

As a follower of several blogs I saw this question posed quite a few times yesterday. The answers I read were very well stated, yet none seemed to capture the essence of the answer fully in my humble opinion. As I thought on the question myself I could only find one definition that seemed to fit, yet it was so simplistic that i knew it would be scoffed at. Therefore, I did a little web surfing to find a favored tale which defines it better than I ever could. I have pasted that tale here for your reading enjoyment. Alas I cannot vouch for the reality of the incident, nor can I identify the author, but the tale does present the definition of evil in a way that I find acceptible and thorough.

Read and enjoy...CFtC

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THE PROFESSOR TEACHES ABOUT EVIL AND CHRISTIANITY

"LET ME EXPLAIN THE problem science has with Jesus Christ." The atheist professor of philosophy pauses before his class and then asks one of his new students to stand. "You're a Christian, aren't you, son?"

"Yes, sir."

"So you believe in God?"

"Absolutely."

"Is God good?"

"Sure! God's good."

"Is God all-powerful? Can God do anything?"

"Yes."

"Are you good or evil?"

"The Bible says I'm evil."

The professor grins knowingly. "Ahh! THE BIBLE!" He considers for a moment. "Here's one for you. Let's say there's a sick person over here and you can cure him. You can do it. Would you help them? Would you try?"

"Yes sir, I would."

"So you're good...!"

"I wouldn't say that."

"Why not say that? You would help a sick and maimed person if you could...in fact most of us would if we could....God doesn't."

[No answer]

"He doesn't, does he? My brother was a Christian who died of cancer even though he prayed to Jesus to heal him. How is this Jesus good? Hmmm? Can you answer that one?"

[No answer]

The elderly man is sympathetic. "No, you can't, can you?" He takes a sip of water from a glass on his desk to give the student time to relax. "In philosophy, you have to go easy with the new ones. Let's start again, young fella. Is God good?"

"Er... Yes."

"Is Satan good?"

"No."

"Where does Satan come from?"

The student falters. "From... God..."

"That's right. God made Satan, didn't he?" The elderly man runs his bony fingers through his thinning hair and turns to the smirking student audience. "I think we're going to have a lot of fun this semester, ladies and gentlemen." He turns back to the Christian. "Tell me, son. Is there evil in this world?"

"Yes, sir."

"Evil's everywhere, isn't it? Did God make everything?"

"Yes."

"Who created evil?"

[No answer]

"Is there sickness in this world? Immorality? Hatred? Ugliness. All the terrible things - do they exist in this world? "

The student squirms on his feet. "Yes."

"Who created them?"

[No answer]

The professor suddenly shouts at his student, "WHO CREATED THEM? TELL ME, PLEASE!" The professor closes in for the kill and climbs into the Christian's face. In a still small voice, he asked, "God created all evil, didn't He, son?"

[No answer]

The student tries to hold the steady, experienced gaze and fails. Suddenly the lecturer breaks away to pace the front of the classroom like an aging panther. The class is mesmerized. "Tell me," he continues, "How is it that this God is good if He created all evil throughout all time?" The professor swishes his arms around to encompass the wickedness of the world. "All the hatred, the brutality, all the pain, all the torture, all the death and ugliness and all the suffering created by this good God is all over the world, isn't it, young man?"

[No answer]

"Don't you see it all over the place? Huh?" Pause. "Don't you?" The professor leans into the student's face again and

whispers, "Is God good?"

[No answer]

"Do you believe in Jesus Christ, son?"

The student's voice betrays him and cracks. "Yes, professor. I do."

The old man shakes his head sadly. "Science says you have five senses you use to identify and observe the world around you. Have you ever seen Jesus?"

"No, sir. I've never seen Him."

"Then tell us if you've ever heard your Jesus?"

"No, sir. I have not."

"Have you ever felt your Jesus, tasted your Jesus or smelt your Jesus... in fact, do you have any sensory perception of your God whatsoever?"

[No answer]

"Answer me, please."

"No, sir, I'm afraid I haven't."

"You're AFRAID... you haven't?"

"No, sir."

"Yet you still believe in him?"

"...yes..."

"That takes FAITH!" The professor smiles sagely at the underling. "According to the rules of empirical, testable, demonstrable protocol, science says your God doesn't exist. What do you say to that, son? Where is your God now?"

[The student doesn't answer]

"Sit down, please."

The first Christian sits...defeated.

Another Christian raises his hand. "Professor, may I address the class?"

The professor turns and smiles. "Ah, yet another Christian in the vanguard! Come, come, young man. Speak some proper wisdom to the gathering."

The Christian looks around the room. "Some interesting points you are making, sir. Now I've got a question for you. Is there such thing as heat?"

"Yes," the professor replies. "There's heat."

"Is there such a thing as cold?"

"Yes, son, there's cold too."

"No, sir, there isn't."

The professor's grin freezes. The room suddenly becomes very quiet. The second Christian continues.

"You can have lots of heat, even more heat, super-heat, mega-heat, white heat, a little heat or no heat, but we don't have anything called 'cold'. We can hit 273 degrees below zero, which is no heat, but we can't go any further after that. There is no such thing as cold, otherwise we would be able to go colder than -273°C. You see, sir, cold is only a word we use to describe the absence of heat. We cannot measure cold. Heat we can measure in thermal units because heat is energy. Cold is not the opposite of heat, sir, just the absence of it."

Silence. A pin drops somewhere in the classroom.

"Is there such a thing as darkness, professor?"

"That's a dumb question, son. What is night if it isn't darkness? What are you getting at...?"

"So you say there is such a thing as darkness?"

"Yes..."

"You're wrong again, sir. Darkness is not something, it is the absence of something. You can have low light, normal light, bright light, flashing light... but if you have no light constantly you have nothing and it's called darkness, isn't it? That's the meaning we use to define the word. In reality, Darkness isn't. If it were, you would be able to make darkness darker and give me a jar of it. Can you... give me a jar of darker darkness, professor?"

Despite himself, the professor smiles at the young effrontery before him. This will indeed be a good semester. "Would you mind telling us what your point is, young man?"

"Yes, professor. My point is, your philosophical premise is flawed to start with and so your conclusion must be in error...."

The professor goes toxic. "Flawed...? How dare you...!"

"Sir, may I explain what I mean?"

The class is all ears.

"Explain... ohhhhh, explain..." The professor makes an admirable effort to regain control. Suddenly he is affability himself. He waves his hand to silence the class, for the student to continue.

"You are working on the premise of duality," the Christian explains. "That for example there is life and then there's death; a good God and a bad God. You are viewing the concept of God as something finite, something we can measure. Sir, science cannot even explain a thought. It uses electricity and magnetism but has never seen, much less fully understood them. To view death as the opposite of life is to be ignorant of the fact that death cannot exist as a substantive thing. Death is not the opposite of life, merely the absence of it." The young man holds up a newspaper he takes from the desk of a neighbor who has been reading it. "Here is one of the most disgusting tabloids this country hosts, professor. Is there such a thing as immorality?"

"Of course there is, now look..."

"Wrong again, sir. You see, immorality is merely the absence of morality. Is there such thing as injustice? No. Injustice is the absence of justice. Is there such a thing as evil?" The Christian pauses. "Isn't evil the absence of good?"

The professor's face has turned an alarming color. He is so angry he is temporarily speechless.

The Christian continues, "If there is evil in the world, professor, and we all agree there is, then God, if He exists, must be accomplishing a work through the agency of evil. What is that work God is accomplishing? The Bible tells us it is to see if each one of us will, of our own free will, choose good over evil."

The professor bridles. "As a philosophical scientist, I don't view this matter as having anything to do with any choice; as a realist, I absolutely do not recognize the concept of God or any other theological factor as being part of the world equation because God is not observable."

The Christian replies, "I would have thought that the absence of God's moral code in this world is probably one of the most observable phenomena going, Newspapers make billions of dollars reporting it every week! Tell me, professor. Do you teach your students that they evolved from a monkey?"

"If you are referring to the natural evolutionary process, young man, yes, of course I do."

"Have you ever observed evolution with your own eyes, sir?"

The professor makes a sucking sound with his teeth and gives his student a silent, stony stare.

"Professor. Since no one has ever observed the process of evolution at work and cannot even prove that this process is an on-going endeavor, are you not teaching your opinion, sir? Are you now not a scientist, but a preacher?"

"I'll overlook your impudence in the light of our philosophical discussion. Now, have you quite finished?" the professor hisses.

"So you don't accept God's moral code to do what is righteous?"

"I believe in what is - that's science!"

"Ahh! SCIENCE!" the student's face splits into a grin. "Sir, you rightly state that science is the study of observed phenomena. Science too is a premise which is flawed..."

"SCIENCE IS FLAWED..?" the professor splutters.

The class is in uproar. The Christian remains standing until the commotion has subsided. "To continue the point you were making earlier to the other student, may I give you an example of what I mean?"

The professor wisely keeps silent.

The Christian looks around the room. "Is there anyone in the class who has ever seen the professor's mind?" The class breaks out into laughter. The Christian points towards his elderly, crumbling tutor. "Is there anyone here who has ever heard the professor's mind... felt the professor's mind, touched or smelt the professor's mind? No one appears to have done so." The Christian shakes his head sadly. "It appears no one here has had any sensory perception of the professor's mind whatsoever. Well, according to the rules of empirical, stable, demonstrable protocol, science, I DECLARE that the professor has no mind."

The class is in chaos.

The Christian sits.

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And there within the story is my simple answer to the question "What is evil?" Evil is the absence of good. Its existance creates a void which only good can fill. Like light entering a drakened room, good can flood in and overtake evil. The greater the evil, the greater the capacity for good to be done. As I told a friend many years ago "Rejoice when your problem seems too great for you to bear, because the bigger the problem, the greater God's miracle will be to deliver you from that problem."

Evil is both the absence of good and the opportunity for good things to happen.

Could it beeeeeeee...SATAN!

Pennies from Heaven

2010-08-14T04:09:00.000-07:00

Pennies…

Every day I see them on the sidewalks and in the streets. People drop them from their pockets or toss them away willingly and leave them for someone else to pick up. They see no value in a penny and so the pennies are discarded and forgotten. But I know that these small unwanted coins are not worthless. They may not be as valuable as other coins or bills, but they are far from worthless.

Coin collectors know that among those discarded pennies are often found rare and valuable pieces to grow their collections. Children know that pennies can be saved up to purchase items needed or wanted. Even the government knows the value of a penny as they draw pennies from each dollar to pay for programs and projects locally, and nationally.

Yet people still toss these coins away and forget them…

But I don’t forget them…They mean something to me.

Each day I pick up lost pennies from the sidewalks and the streets and take them with me. To me these coins represent those discarded and unwanted souls in the world around me. Each penny reminds me of people that have been cast aside by society and forgotten. The world thinks these people are worthless, but I know that they are precious souls created by a mighty God who loves them. I know that they are prized greatly by the Lord and that makes them of great value to me.

In Luke 15:8-10, Jesus told of a woman who lost a single coin. Once she realized it was missing, she searched her entire house until it was found. Then she called her friends together and held a celebration because she had found her lost coin.

So the next time you see a discarded penny, please pick it up and keep it as a reminder that God has not forgotten you. Like the woman in the parable, He is searching for you. You are not worthless to Him. You are a lost treasure and He will turn the world upside down to find you.

I come to you in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ offering my hand in friendship and service. If I can be of any help to you, please allow me to do so.

I can be contacted via email at crossfire_the_crusader@live.com.

Luke 15:8-10 (New Living Translation)

Or suppose a woman has ten silver coins[a] and loses one. Won’t she light a lamp and sweep the entire house and search carefully until she finds it? And when she finds it, she will call in her friends and neighbors and say, ‘Rejoice with me because I have found my lost coin.’ In the same way, there is joy in the presence of God’s angels when even one sinner repents.”

There's my two cents worth...LOL

Significant others - The Lois Lane Syndrome

2010-08-10T06:33:00.000-07:00

The past few days of my life have been spent at the Cross Cave caring for the most important and beloved person in my life - My blushing bride. As I have cared for her during this illness I have found my mind wandering to thoughts of the significant others of our favorite fictional characters and how they have altered the influence of those comic heroes.

One doesn't have to think hard to remember a situation where Superman is out doing good and has to stop to rescue Lois Lane from trouble. He has rescued her from supervillains, street thugs, burning buildings, natural disasters, and random accidents caused by her overzealousness. She's been plucked from falling helicopters, crashing airplanes, speeding vehicles, and when falling from open windows. Superman has saved her from speeding bullets, arrows, knives, exotic weapons, energy rays, and explosive devices. She's allowed herself to be cornered by viscious animals, gang bangers, nazi soldiers, mad scientists, and every manner of common criminal or supervillain lacky imaginable.

In the movies, Superman even violated the temporal prime directive and turned the earth backwards on its access c ausing a disruption of the time-space continuum (much to the chagrin of Dr. Who and Agent Berrillium) in order to rescue her from being buried alive in her car (which she would have survived if she'd just opened the door and gotten out BTW) during an earthquake caused by Lex Luthor's seismic manipulations.

Face it...that girl is always in trouble! Its almost like by saving her that first time, Superman doomed her to an existance right out of the FINAL DESTINATION movie series.

You would think Superman would say "Enough already woman! You are not the only person in the world who needs rescuing!" But he doesn't...perhaps that's because to him she IS the most important person in the world.

Superman took an oath - if only in his heart - to serve and protect the world. However, he also allowed part of his heart to have a greater hold on him and that part is held by Lois Lane.

We see a similar thing when we look at Spider-Man. No matter whether it was Betty Brant, Gwen Stacy, Felcia Hardy, or Mary Jane Watson that held his heart at the time, they always seemed to be doomed to become victim of the latest simister plot or natural disaster. Face it if there are five thousand people jammed into a concert hall and Dr. Octopus takes a hostage it will be Peter Parker's date EVERY FRIGGIN TIME!

What's up with that?

There is an old proverb that says when a man takes a wife he puts himself in a position of weakness that allows him to be controlled or manipulated. The reasoning behind this proverb is because a married man has a commitment to his spouse that supercedes all else and unscrupulous individuals are prone to use that as leverage by threatening his family.

Remember the choice Batman had to make in "The Dark Knight?" After severely beating the Joker to gain the information he needed to find Rachel, he was forced to choose between her and Harvey Dent. Unfortunately for Rachel, Batman chose to save Dent because he saw him as the one who could stop the crime spree and break the backs of the cartels in Gotham City. Of course that didn't work so well for him in the end, but he chose to ignore his heart and focus on his mission.

I suspect Superman would have saved Lois, and Spider-Man would have saved Mary Jane. I know I would save Mrs. Cross before anyone else...its unfathomable to do otherwise.

A few years back I saw a video that blew my mind. It was called "The Bridge." It was based on a true story. The father in this video is forced to make a choice that I could not have made. Watch this for a moment.

I know that I would always choose to save my wife, daughters, or granddaughter before anyone else. Does that make me less of a hero? I don't know. But like Superman, I have tied my destiny to the life of one woman who holds my heart in her tiny hands. If I was forced to choose between saving her or Harvey Dent, then poor Harvey gets to met Jesus face to face. If I have to choose between her and a train filled with people then the train will lose. My fatal flaw is that I will do anything for her even if it means negelecting everything else. I'm not Batman...my heart comes first and my wife holds holds my heart.

Sorry Harvey...you're on your own.

Of course, this mentality has slowed my progress as a RLSH. Life has placed me in some interesting positions over the past few years. I've done what I was able to do when opportunity presented itself, but my focus has been on the care of my wife and children. Layoffs, health issues, and other situations forced me to relocate the family more than once and to pursue job opportunities that were less than pleasant for me in order to provide for the family's needs. Its only been in the last few weeks that I've been able to make plans to re-open my business and return to the work I love - children's entertainment.

As I move forward as a clown, court jester, children's entertainer and RLSH, I realize that I still have to remember my own Lois Lane. Mrs. Cross still has health issues, and still gains the majority of my time and focus. I don't see that changing any time soon because - like Superman does for Lois - I choose to honor her with my heart and my life. My service will be to her first and the world second.

Sorry world...nothing personal, but you're on your own...say hello to Harvey Dent.

In the meantime, I'll be right here caring for Mrs. Cross until she is feeling better and the opportunity comes for me to suit up and take another walk on that high road.

For the Lion and the Lamb...this is Crossfire the Crusader...(and Mrs. Cross)...Have a blessed day!

Batmobiles, Mystery Machines, Fantasticars, and Quinjets

2010-07-08T08:54:00.000-07:00

Anyone who's been around the RLSH community for any time has seen the amazing "Supermobile" in which my friend Superhero patrols the streets of Clearwater, Florida. And I personally dont have to go too far from home to find the Batmobile (from the '89 BATMAN) or the Mystery Machine (an actual working replica of the cartoon van.) A few years back I passed up an opportunity to go see the Batmobile from the 60's TV series while I was performing in Sioux Falls, South Dakota. And I even got to see ECTO-1 from Ghostbusters at the Dairy Queen one afternoon...I'm not sure why they were there BTW.

It was a little over a year ago when I posed for the picture above on my motorcycle. I was going to a Comic Convention in Little Rock and stopped in the driveway long enough to snap the picture before climbing into the car for my day trip to the big town. I have since actually ridden the bike while in my Crossfire garb on a couple of occasions, but not on anything I would consider a patrol.

BUT...I have discovered that my choice of Supermobile may in fact be as qualified as the batmobile, supermobile, mystery machine, or any other super-heroic form of transportation...at least in a very practical sense it is.

You see, my wonderful CF Moto 250T V3 is now being marketed as a POLICE VEHICLE! Apparently these simple - automatic transmission - motorcycles are 1/3 to 1/4 the cost of a police car and since they get 3-4 times better gas mileage they are cheaper to operate. This allows the police forces to spread their people out farther than conventional methods, with minimal training, and does it at a fraction of the cost. Now a 250CC motorcycole is not going to run down a fleeing vehicle, they will still need cruisers for that, but on the average day-to-day calls one of these bikes can get an officer from point A to point B in style and in plenty of time.

Look out Batman! Watch out Scooby Doo! Crossfire the Crusader is taking it to the streets...Perhaps I should rename my bike "The Holy Roller."

HOW TO WRITE AN RLSV BLOG FOR DUMMIES

2010-06-20T07:25:00.000-07:00

Greetings my loyal readers…Allow me to thank you for your patronage of this blog and warn you of the message that is to follow. It appears that the infamous GILROY THE JESTER has once again escaped from the dungeon and has left me with THIS article to share with you. Please remember as you read this that it is purely and 100% satire…

if you find it offensive, please feel free to go jump into the nearest lake…

Sorry about that folks, that stupid clown took over the keyboard again…

Shut up hero and post the blog already!

OK…here it is

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I am the voice of Chaos in a world of order…I am Gilroy The Jester…and these are pages from my dark and twisted mind…Enter freely and enjoy…but be aware that any and all who enter may find themselves the target of the jester’s amusements.

Satire…

For weeks I’ve been making a study of satire and its main proponents in the RLSH/RLSV community. Like a spandex clad Dian Fossey I have infiltrated the heart of the satirist culture and have observed their ways and have come to several conclusions about their use of the medium of satire. I now publish these findings in an article I call…

HOW TO WRITE A RLSV BLOG FOR DUMMIES!!!

I have observed over the past few weeks a few key points to writing a successful RLSV blog. The most important point of the blog is that there needs to be no real direction or meat to the text. Just toss together a few random thoughts and you have the base for an effective anti RLSH rant that will surely attract the ire of your chosen foes. Once you have your base article, you will need to add in the key elements that take it from “extremely lame” to “its lame, but its like a train wreck and I can’t look away.”

KEY ELEMENT #1: NAME YOUR ENEMY! If you intend to blog about someone, you must first and foremost make sure they know they are being blogged about. You must name them and do so in a way that your article will be picked up by all the major search engines.

For the sake of this article I will be using one of my favorite groups of foes the LAZY ORGANIZATION SUPPLYING EXTREMELY ROTTEN SATIRE (AKA – LOSERS) I think their real name anacronym is BUGS or BEETLES or something similarly insectoid.

And please remember this article is purely satire…do not take anything I the mighty GILROY shouts down at you from my pedestal to be anything other than me being a jerk…This is all tongue in cheek and meant as a joke.

LOSERS!!!!

KEY ELEMENT #2: You must constantly pace disclaimers in the article stating that the article is purely satire…even if it isnt…but it really is…but it isn’t meant to offend…but who cares if it does…BECAUSE ITS JUST SATIRE!

Just joking…or am I?

KEY ELEMENT #3: POOR PHOTOSHOP PICTURE – No RLSV blog will be effective unless you take your chosen target and put them into a poorly created photoshop image that you can use to taunt them. My favorite example of this is my picture of the leader of the losers the POTENT-SAURUS HIMSELF.

And so nobody else is left out I will add pics of his crew the VILLAI-TUBBIES!

Oh…remember…this is just satire…I mean none of this…really…it’s a joke

KEY ELEMENT #4: THE BASELESS ACCUSATION- No RLSV blog would be complete without somehow accusing the target of something outlandish and unproveable.

For example let us take LORD McHALITOSIS and his search for the most evil sandwich. For weeks we have tried to discover who it is that hides behind that mask and why he feels the need to wear it. One theory is that the mask is actually a filter to hide his onion breath, but my research has revealed that it is actually a clever disguise to hide the TRUE VILLAIN underneath…and I’ve narrowed it down to two possibilities…It has to be ONE of these for who else would want to seek out that most evil of sandwiches to punish the world as he does?

And of course…this is just satire…it’s a joke…nothing serious about it….just kidding...except about the onion breath

KEY ELEMENT #5: THE SNARKY COMENTS- Unlike the baseless accusations, the snarky comment is meant to wound the reader by challenging their integrity, their manhood, or their very existance. These short but bitter-sweet comments can be tossed out anywhere.

For example allow me to discuss the PLATINUM FRY-COOK. As a chef who has gone off the deep end into the realm of evil one would expect HIM to be the one seeking the most evil sandwich, however it is rumored that he is spending most of his time revising the third book in his series on how to make ice cubes. I know this sounds outrageous, but if you’ve read his five volume series on boiling water you might understand. It helps if you actually know what he means when he writes something like “BORK BORK BORK SHEBORK BORKBORK” but I think there is a real cooking genius trapped somewhere in that mind…maybe he will escape someday SO WE CAN MEET HIM.

And that was a four course helping of satire my spatulated friend…don’t take it personal...and you might try boiling that water in a pan next time so the flames wont keep going out on your stove

KEY ELEMENT #6:THE SEGUE- One skill that cannot be overlooked is the ability to take any conversation and point it toward your favorite target of ridicule. Allow me to demonstrate…

The PLATINUM FRY COOK’S special flavoring – you know that one that leaves such a memorable if not enjoyable taste in your mouth afterwards – can most likely be attributed to the use of a certain SMELLY UTENSIL. Perhaps he should keep CRAP CUTTER out of the kitchen while he is cooking…and allow me to warn all the super villains to avoid Mr. CUTTER’s contribution to the annual RLSV picnic…Soylent Brown is NOT people!!! Ewwww

And this is still satire…mostly…but don’t trust that fudge…I am warning you about that…of course it could be a joke….this is satire you know.

KEY ELEMENT #7: MALICIOUS LINKS – LORD McHALITOSIS is the master of the malicious link. You can see them throughout his blogs as he takes names like MALGRODDO and makes them into portals to videos and pictures that are less than flattering. As a result any reader who clicks on MALGRODDO will be taken to somewhere that MALGRODDO doesn’t want them to go.

Do I need to post an example of this? OK…MALGRODDO!

Oh yeah…this is satire.

KEY ELEMENT #9: THE CHEAP SHOT – Cheap shots are par for course in this line of work. You take something that the person you have targeted is insecure about and throw it in their face.

Now for an example…who have I missed? Oh yeah…Agent Plutonium!

I’m not really sure I can actually Do a cheap chot on Agent P though…even though it was SHE who first brought my good natured alter ego into this world of RLSV blogs, I an’t help but find her to be funny, and rather a lovely specimen of humanity. Agent P forgive me for saying this so publically, but (cue the violins) I am certain that the morning sun is envious for it knows that in all its glory it pales when compared to your beauty. My eyes are sad for they know that they may never …ever…truly gaze upon your smiling face…however my heart rejoices for it knows that tonight I shall hold your lovely form close to me as we dance together in your dreams…And my fair lady remember this…this…this is SATIRE! NOTHING I SAY HERE IS TO BE CONSIDERED TRUE IN ANY WAY, SHAPE OR FORM

(Sticks out tongue and dances away laughing)

Yeah…that satire thing again…just joking

Hee Hee Hee

And there you have it, the key elements of a successful RLSV blog…Until next time this is Gilroy reminding you to challenge the knights if you like, but never anger the Jester! (evil laugh – thunder clap)

Oh yeah… one more thing…

KEY ELEMENT #10: THE PARTING SHOT – LORD McHALITOSIS …you really should keep Comrade Cookie on a leash. He was tossed out of the KITTY KAT KLUB last night for illegal use of paws!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

-------------------

Well…That was interesting…I’m gonna go check the locks on the dungeon doors now and try to make sure this never happens again.

CFtC

Justice or Vengeance - part 2

2010-06-17T01:27:00.000-07:00

A few days ago I mentioned my concern that some RLSH type would eventually end up crossing the line into becoming judge, jury, and executioner. The hardline stance of the dark avenger types is that one must break the law to stop criminal activity whereas I advocate taking that high road where you choose to obey the laws that you are demanding everyone else obey...what a concept.

Anyhow, I couldn't have been given a better example of what im talking about than the video of a Seattle Police officer's confrontation with two teenage girls this week.

First, let me state that the women in this video were in the wrong. They were obviously beligerant and when the second woman placed her hands on the officer she committed an act we call assault. In case you didn't realize it, assault simply means she placed her hands on someone without their permission and without legal authority. The first woman was clearly resisting arrest. So both women WERE in violation of the law.

Second, let me say that the officer in this video was also wrong. He made a very poor decision when he punched at the womans face. There were probably several other reactions he could have had to the situation but he lashed out - probably in anger, frustration, or a moment of panic.

BUT what is most disturbing is the reactions of the crowd. They were basically cheering the girls on for resisting the officer in what could have been a simple short conversation instead of an incident that resulted in two people going to jail and a third being under investigation for use of force. There were times during the video where it almost looked to me as if the crowd was going to rush in and "rescue" the woman from the officer.

As you look at this video, imagine for a moment that instead of a uniformed police officer we have a costumed vigilante. If the crowd in the video was on the side of the suspect and not the officer, how much support do you think "Captain Smash" is going to get from the people around him while he is wailing on Bubba and Beaux for selling moonshine out of the back of their van? Do you think the police will stand behind the Captain when someone posts video evidence of his vigilante activity? How much public outrage would there be if he lost control and went all "Rodney King" on them?

Now imagine another video where a young lady is being harassed by a street thug and "Hero X" rushes in from nowhere and seperates her from her assailant. Hero X may take a few punches, but uses only the necessary amount of force to protect the young lady from harm. The situation quickly diffuses as the assailant realizes that he doesnt want to stay in one place for long because the police are most likely on the way. In the end, the RLSH walks away with a few new bruises and the woman is safe.

The second video would most likely be flamed as being staged or fake while the first video would be used to demand new laws and/or prosecution for the crimes of "Captain Smash."

A simple fact in our world is that people are heartless. They are ready to demand punishment for those they feel are wrong, but do not want to acknowledge the people who are doing a good job in the war on crime. Good police officers don't make the papers. Good soldiers don't make the news. Good political figures don't get headlines. Its the bad apples that everyone hears about and they get to set the standard by which everyone else is measured.

My supervisor used to tell me that one "Oh Crap" cancels out a hundred "attaboys." Think about that for a moment.

So whatever you may think about the actions of this officer or the two girls in the video, remember the reactions of the crowd. If you want to change the world we live in, they are the ones you need to change. They are the ones who will demand that the citizens of their cities stop showing their rear ends and start acting right. They are the ones who will cheer or protest at the actions of the law enforcers as they do their jobs. They are the ones who will determine if "Hero X" can be effective in bringing about a bold new world.

That person you beat down and leave on the sidewalk for the police to collect won't change the crime rates. The people who see you standing up to the dealers/pimps/crackheads/etc with strength, fairness and a respect for the law you are enforcing are the ones who will make the change. They know a hypocrite when they see one. If you are breaking the law in your crusade then you will NEVER have their respect. They may fear you, but on the streets that marks you for a quick death, not the urban legend status you hope to achieve.

As for me, I'll keep walking that high road. Its served me well for years and the results achieved there are longer lasting.

CFtC

I SALUTE THEE, MEN OF VALOR!!!

2010-06-15T15:55:00.000-07:00

This past week I have been honored to witness a group of true heroes. My new job has allowed me to meet face-to-face the men who are busy searching the Albert Pike Campgrounds near Hot Springs, Arkansas to recover the bodies of those men, women, and children who were lost in the unprecedented flash floods last week. These men are up before dark each morning and rushing to the site to be there before the sunrise and there until it is too dark each evening and they are ordered - yes I said ORDERED - to leave. (Many of them would stay beyond the time they do if not ordered to go rest BTW) These men are braving dangerous conditions that include large scale debris - cabins that were washed off the mountains, cars, fallen trees etc. - extreme heat and massive amounts of snakes (apparently they were also washed out of the hills in large numbers)

Their efforts have resulted in the recovery of 20 bodies...but they are still looking for others.

In a world that needs it s heroes, these men are among the best of the best. They aren't wearing capes or spandex...just a simple uniform shirt that identifies them as employees of the Forestry service...but they are definately men of valor and for that I salute them!

Good job heroes! Keep up the good work.

Justice or vengeance?

2010-06-10T19:09:00.000-07:00

I recently had a short, but blunt discussion with another person about the issue of proper use of force. This individual felt it wrong of me to insist that people taking part in the Crossfire Challenge would be required to obey the law.

Apparently he felt that in order to make the necessary change to society he would have to instill fear in those around him. The best way to do that, in his stated opinion, was to act as judge, jury, and executioner. He stated point blank that if he caught someone trying to rob another person he would "punish" the suspect and not feel the need to call the police.

I argued that its possible to stand up to criminals - and even to use physical force - without breaking the law ourselves and that if you think its different then you are not accomplishing your mission.

Apparently having self control, good judgement, and respect for the laws that we are claiming to defend is a sign of weakness...hmm

So I got to wondering. What exactly does it MEAN to call ones self a crime fighter? Do you intend to stop anyone who breaks any law? Or are you just going to pick and choose which laws are good enough to keep for which people.

Are you going to beat up the soccer mom who has a leadfoot and races across town in her minivan with no regard for the speed limit?

Are you going to punish the young lady who is selling her body for sex on the street corner?

Will you wail on a man caught stealing food for his kids?

Are you certain that when you walk up on a robbery in progress or a fight in the street you will be able to decide which is the agressor and which is the victim?

I've seen guys get attacked by ladies and then the ladies cry that they were the victim. How do you know when you are witnessing an actual crime and not just a someone who wants to ride the drama train to manipulation avenue?

How do you intend to determine when a case of child abuse is legit or not. What about spousal abuse? Are you willing to risk your reputation to punish a father for the words of a teacher/grandparent/etc who saw a bruise on the child that came from an accident on the playground?

Is it OK for a teenager to have a bottle of scotch in your eyes? Its against the law! Why not teach them a lesson?

As RLSH types we can choose to "serve and protect" or to feed our own egos. Serving and protecting includes the knowledge of the proper usage of force. Too many "heroes" are more interested in taking a gun to a knife fight. They think its cool to think of themselves as the Punisher or Deadpool and want to go out and build a name for their selves at the cost of not-so-innocent blood.

Do you realize that Punisher and Deadpool started out as criminals? Punisher was actually a villain when he first appeared. He was actually taking shots at jaywalkers and litterers. Deadpool was a hired assassin/mercenary. Neither were intended to be heroes.

Of course, the anti-hero argument I have heard that is most hilarious is that its OK to go to jail for what you believe in since MLK and others like him went to jail. Give me a break!

There's a big difference between peaceful protesters and violent vigilantes. If you go to jail for punishing a perpetrator, you will do hard time and the criminal will walk free with a strong civil rights violation to go to court with.

Why?

Because it's against the law to inflict your chosen form of punishment on a person who has stopped being agressive or who may have been committing a crime a few minutes before but has now stopped.

And if you are considering the path of crime-breaking crime-figter, then remember that once you cross that line, YOU have become the criminal. Take THIS video into consideration before you decide to cross that line. This could be YOU!

So, if you feel the need to step over that line, then do as you wish, but realize that when you break the law for any reason then YOU are the criminal. I for one choose to stay on the proper side of the law.

Remember, if in the process of punishing criminals you BECOME the criminal then RLSH is not the title for you. The proper word for that is HYPOCRITE!

I'll meet the rest of you on the high road.

CFtC

Heroes of all sizes

2010-04-30T20:19:00.000-07:00

One of the goals of this blog is going to be to point out opportunities to serve the world around us. One of these oportunities that can be found in almost any part of the country is the RONALD MCDONALD HOUSE CHARITIES. (My apologies to my overseas friends but I have not the mental resources to visualize and identify opportunities outside the USA) This wonderful organization has blessed and continues to bless the families of children who are hospitalized for all manner of illnesses and injuries.

Ronald McDonald House Charities area locally funded and operated non-profit 501(c)3 organizations dedicated to enhancing the lives of children and their families by creating and supporting programs that directly improve the health and well being of children. They tailor their programs to address the most urgent needs of the community to keep kids healthy and happy. These needs include how families can stay near and support a hospitalized child, how to afford staying together in another city while a child is undergoing treatment and how a child can receive basic dental care in an underserved community. We not only help families address these problems, we provide solutions through the Ronald McDonald House of Arkansas and the Ronald McDonald Care Mobile. (paraphrased/plagerized from their website)

The opportunites to serve at RHMC include donations of cash and supplies, cleaning days, special events, family support activities, and the open invitation to organize a fund raiser for them. Finding a way to serve is as simple as looking up the website of your local RMHC to see what needs they have listed and then do something to fill that need.

In other words volunteer...donate...host a fund raiser...If you only have a few minutes to offer you can pick up a case of toilet tissue or cleaning supplies or anything else they are needing (see the site for a list)

You dont HAVE to be in your RLSH personna to serve, but something tells me they might be receptive to creative individuals with serving hearts...after all they work for a clown and their video clearly shows that they understand what it takes to be a hero...and thats a heroic effort. Their video, in my opinion, is an awesome representation of the hearts of these amazing little warriors who are battling against unfair odds as they face down enemies like cancer, leukemia, sickle cell anemia, birth defects and other diseases.

As RLSH We can find many causes to support, and I believe that RMHC is one that is truly worthy of our support...or as the video says so eloquently...lets help them so they can help these little heroes to win.

Five Must See Movies

2010-04-27T04:40:00.000-07:00

I've been listening to a lot of discussion about the movies Kick-*** and Defendor over the past week or so and it got me to thinking...scary huh...And I asked myself what movies I would suggest to an aspiring RLSH if I had to pick the perfect RLSH movie.

Let me start by saying that i have not seen either of these movies, but I do not think I would change my choices here if I had seen them simply based on what I know about them already.

Also, I do not think Kick-*** is a true representation of a RLSH. I've seen the fight scenes with Hit Girl on the previews and they are about as realistic as THE FLYING NUN. (If you are too young to remember it, please google it)

I suspect Defendor - based on what I've been told - is probably more like THE A-TEAM (not the new movie, but the original series) than a true RLSH.

I intend to see both eventually, but I tend to wait for the DVD rather than spend $27 apiece on tickets, drinks and popcorn to see it in the theatre.

But I digress...I came up with five movies that I think would benefit any RLSH to watch before going out in the real world. You may laugh, but I think my reasoning will prove sound once you get past the initial laugh.

MOVIE #1: HERO AT LARGE (Starring John Ritter)

This movie to me is the best representation of a RLSH on film in my opinion. John Ritter plays an actor who is hired to dress as a ficitonal comic book her "Captain Avenger" to help promote a movie. On the way home he stops at the corner store and unexpectedly stops a robbery while in costume. The city goes crazy. Everyone wants to see the movie and they all want to know when the REAL Captain Avenger will appear again. Over the next few weeks he makes every possible mistake a RLSH could make including getting himself shot while interfering in a police chase. He later allows himself to be talked into some even dumber stuff like faking appearances and speaking at a rally to support a political candidate. The movie ends on a happy note, but not before everyone has to do a little soul searching to find out what a true hero is.

MOVIE #2: PATCH ADAMS (Starring Robin Williams)

I know this is not anyones idea of a superhero movie, but hear me out on this. Hunter "Patch" Adams is a REAL person who decided to change the world in a creative way. Before you ever get into the fun of the movie, you have to realize that this is based on a REAL story. There is a REAL Patch Adams who inspired this film. That's only one reason I think any aspiring RLSH should see this. The other reason is to encourage them to not give up. When everyone tells you you are stupid for dreaming of something different you can look back at the parts of this movie where the professors and administrators told him that he would never be a doctor - despite his high grades. When unusual problems block your path or people resist you, you can look at the parts where he helped his friend overcome the imaginary squirrels or how he faced the challenge of the dying man who hated everyone. And when the worst in life happens and your entire world is shattered by something senseless and tragic, you can look at how he faced the loss of the girl he loved at the hands of a murderer and know that your pain can be lessened by reaching out to others.

MOVIE #3: DEATH TO SMOOCHY (Starring Ed Norton)

This is probably the most unusual movie in the list, but its here for a reason. In this movie Ed Norton plays a man who wants to change the world, and in the process of pursuing this goal, the world almost changes him. Anytime you have a group of people who are creative and flambouyant, you will have to deal with something my brother calls "the Primadonna Complex." That means you will find that people with big personalities tend to fill the room when they enter it and they tend to get defensive when faced with another room-filling personality. Smoochy is targeted by charitable organizations, network producers, and a former kids how host (played by Robin Williams) who literally wants to kill him. He is set up to be disgraced publically and even shot at while performing on ice show. One of his friends is murdered and people he thought were his friends betray him. Like Smoochy, an aspiring RLSH can easily find himself tossed about by the different factions of the RLSH/RLSV community and may soon forget WHY he chose to don the cape in the first place. This movie is good entertainment, but watch for the underlying messages and learn from them.

And a warning - the lady who plays the Irish Mob boss is seriously creepy IMHO.

MOVIE #4: FALLING DOWN (Starring Michael Douglas)

This movie is valuable because it shows how a man can do what feels right and just and still be wrong. The first time I watched this movie I realized at the very end of the movie that I'd been cheering for the wrong guy. When the bad guy says "I'm the bad guy? How did that happen?" I had a sudden "Whoa" moment and saw how easily it cold have been ME doing those things. You may need to watch this three or four times before you really get the point. As an aspiring RLSH I advise you to watch this to see what happens when you step outside the law. No matter how evil the people you are facing might be, you must remain on the side of law and order. Vigilante justice is not the answer. You are NOT allowed to put yourself in the place of the judge, jury, and executioner. You may find yourself in a situation where physical force must be used to protect someones life or property, but you should never go beyond the level of force necessary to end the threat. You may find it real easy to progress from simply defending yourself to cold blooded murder just as Michael Douglas does in the movie...and don't think that just because a person is a scumbag that his life is not valuable in the eyes of the law. Its real easy to sympathize with the bad guy when he kills the White Supremicist/Nazi Wannabe toward the end of the story, but he's only a few minutes away from murdering his own child at that point. As a RLSH you MUST NEVER allow yourself to forget the value of human life or the God given rights (civil rights) of the people you encounter.

MOVIE #5: THE CROSS AND THE SWITCHBLADE (Starring Pat Boone and Eric Estrada)

If you've known me for any amount of time, you should have seen this one coming. This movie is based on another true story and any RLSH can learn from it if they pay attention. It tells the tale of Dave Wilkerson and his crusade to reach the street gangs of New York City. The movie is filled with scenes of him doing things that seemed completely useless to achieve his goals. It seems that all he does is anger the gang members - especially Nicky Cruz. In one scene Nicky pulls a knife on him and threatens to cut him up because Dave told him that He loved him and Jesus loved him. "I'll cut you up if you say that again." He shouts. However instead of backing down Dave Wilkerson said something powerful. He said "You can do that...you could cut me into a million pieces and scatter them all over this street...and every piece would shout out 'I Love You'." He never gave up and never backed down and in the end he WON! Dave Wilkerson suceeded in winning many of the gang members to Jesus and the first of them was NICKY CRUZ. He did it not by pullng a bigger gun or a longer knife, but by standing his ground, being caring and kind, and by being REAL. At one point he is talking to a person who is belittling him. The guy keeps making remarks about how a man with fancy clothes and fancy shoes wouldn't understand the needs of a street person. Dave Wilkerson responds by giving the man his shoes. He overcame the negative by strengthening the positive.

All in all, I think these five movies can can inspire and guide any potential RLSH members if they just pay attention to the messages inside them.

I thank you again for visiting my blog and allowing me to share my thoughts.

For the Lion and the Lamb...I am Crossfire the Crusader

Good Journey